When couples are planning their wedding day, one of the biggest decisions that comes up is whether or not to do a first look. While it’s definitely not required, choosing to see each other before the ceremony can bring so many beautiful benefits, both practical and emotional. From calming pre-ceremony nerves to giving you more time with your guests, a first look is worth considering as you plan your timeline.
1. A Private, Quiet Moment Together
Your wedding day is a fun celebration, but it can also feel a little overwhelming with so many moving parts. A first look gives you and your partner a quiet moment – just the two of you – to breathe, soak it all in, and actually be present together before the whirlwind begins. For a lot of couples, this ends up being one of the most emotional, intimate parts of the day. It also helps take away any anxiety going into the official ceremony.
2. Calms the Nerves
Even the most laid-back couples get a little jittery before walking down the aisle. Seeing each other beforehand can take the edge off those nerves and help you feel good to go. Instead of carrying all that anticipation until the ceremony, you get to release it early and enjoy your vows with more ease.
A stress-free wedding day starts with feeling grounded – Martha Stewart Weddings shares more tips here.
3. More Time for Photos (Without the Rush!)
Logistically, a first look is a game-changer. It gives us time to capture couples portraits before the ceremony when your hair and makeup are freshly done, and it often allows us to knock out wedding party photos and some family groupings, too. That way, after the ceremony, you’re not rushing through portraits…you can go straight into enjoying cocktail hour with your guests.
Need help organizing your family photo list so it flows smoothly? Check out my post on how to create a wedding family list for stress-free group photos.
4. You Actually Get to Enjoy Cocktail Hour
Speaking of cocktail hour…if you do a first look, there’s a very good chance you’ll actually get to join in the fun. Most couples tell me they loved mingling with their guests and grabbing a drink instead of disappearing for an hour of portraits. At the end of the day, you want to enjoy your wedding – not feel like you’re apart of some massive photoshoot.
5. More Flexibility with Your Timeline
If you’re planning a wedding during the shorter days of fall or winter, a first look helps ensure we have plenty of daylight for portraits. Even in the summer, it creates breathing room in your schedule so the day feels more relaxed and less crammed.
Still piecing together your timeline? You might also love my blog on how to plan a Michigan wedding.
6. Double the Reactions
One of the biggest hesitations I hear is: “But what about the reaction when I walk down the aisle?” The good news is: you don’t lose that! Many couples are surprised to find that they get two amazing reactions: one during the private first look and another when you lock eyes as you walk down the aisle in front of your family and friends.
Final Thoughts On Having A First Look
If you’re still deciding whether a first look is right for you, here’s a quick recap of the biggest perks couples love:
- A quiet, private moment together before the day gets busy
- Eases nerves so you can feel less anxious going into the actual ceremony
- Extra time for portraits without feeling rushed
- Freedom to actually enjoy cocktail hour with your guests
- A smoother, more flexible timeline (especially with shorter daylight)
- Double the reactions…one intimate, one in front of loved ones
At the end of the day, your wedding should feel like you. If these benefits sound like the kind of experience you’d love, a first look might be the perfect fit. If not, a traditional aisle reveal is just as meaningful.
Not Ready for a Full First Look? Try These Alternatives
If you love the idea of sharing a private moment before the ceremony but don’t want to fully see each other yet, there are a couple of beautiful alternatives:
A First Touch
This could look like holding hands around a doorframe or standing on opposite sides of a wall. You don’t see each other, but you still get that intimate, grounding moment together. Some couples use this time to exchange letters or simply talk and pray together before the ceremony.
Back-to-Back Vows
Another meaningful option is standing back-to-back so you don’t see one another, but you can read your vows out loud in private. It’s an incredibly emotional way to share your promises before the big moment, while still keeping the aisle reveal for your family and friends.
Both options give you the chance to ease nerves, connect, and slow down together, without giving away the full surprise.
Read up on what to know about first looks here
If you’d like help mapping out a timeline that makes the most of your wedding day, I’d love to chat. You can inquire here.
✨ Pro Tip: If you’re starting to plan your wedding and want more resources, check out these posts too:
- What Questions to Ask Your Wedding Photographer
- How Much Does Wedding Photography Cost in Michigan?
- How to Budget a Wedding Without Selling a Kidney
- The Best Wedding Dress Shops in Michigan
- The Best wedding photographers in Michigan
- What makes a luxury wedding photographer
©Cheleana Rowan, with Cheleanamarie Photography, 2015-2025. Unauthorized use and or duplication of this material without express and written consent from Cheleana Rowan is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full clear credit is given to Cheleana Rowan with Cheleanamarie Photography with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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